I looked in the Mirror

I woke up one day doing my normal Tuesday routine gym, shower, work and bible study. I got dressed for work, did a final take in the mirror before walking out the door and I learned that I didn’t like what I saw. I loved my outfit, my edges were slayed but something was missing. I learned that what I saw in the mirror is not what I liked. When I looked in the mirror I learned that the person who was looking back at me is not the person that I like. I did not like where she was in life, who she was, what she stood for, the way she acted and the way she talked. The person that was looking back at me wasn’t the one I wanted to be nor the person that models herself after God’s heart. It was this day I decided to turn my life around! Be the girl who I always wanted too. Be the girl who God called with purpose! It was this day that I decided I wanted God to show me who I was and who I needed to be. God showed me that I was pretending to be one person that I really shouldn’t be. When God showed me that it was very hurtful but necessary.

After God showed me that, I made up my mind that I was going to be the Woman he called to Purpose.  Before that I was the girl who didn’t love herself, who didn’t respect herself, who didn’t know her worth. I was the girl who was pretending to be someone but preaching about something else. In this moment, God showed me a broken and hurting girl that was living her life according to what others wanted from her, not what He stated! See I was living to what my family, friends, church associates wanted me to be or what they said I should be. After this moment, I started spending more time with God, got a christian therapist and said to hell with everyone who thought I should be a certain person.
You make me love me
I started loving and learning Tynesha! I started appreciating all my quirkiness, beauty, nerdiness, talents, dimples, gifts and mostly importantly I appreciated God for showing me that I AM ENOUGH! He designed me a certain way and he wanted for so long for me to love and appreciate it!

I say all this to say FIND YOU! Find the person that God sees and wants to mold into! He is the designer of your life and he wants to give you the best! Stop pretending that you aren’t hurt or hurting, that you don’t have low self-esteem, that you are not in love and get to a humble, open and transparent place and God will show you who you are! He will also heal you!!

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